As much as I'd like to leave my last entry up for the rest of my life, I need to move on a little. Things have not really changed with the Matt situation, except that we've talked on the phone about five times and we've gone out to lunch twice. We are friendly, but I am keeping my eyes and ears open for good signs. I want this all to end soon. I keep myself going with the hope that he will want me back and I can be happy again. If I let that lapse, I feel like driving my car over an edge.

My friends have been extremely supportive and nice to me. Joe and Nichole took me under their wings for two weeks and Tina has been there whenever I needed her. The best thing about my friends is that they don't want to talk about it all the time, they don't ask questions and they don't pry. If I want to talk about it (which I rarely do) they just listen. My mom needs to take a lesson from them.

I've involved myself in a program called RAD (Rape Agression Defense). It is the best thing that ever happened to me. You learn all these sweet moves to get out of dangerous situations. It's actually been keeping me going for the past 3 weeks.

Sorry that this is still rather somber and depressed, I have been doing better, and I have had some serious fun with my friends, but....